just words

2011-07-31T22:39:00.000+08:00

my cuzzen hazwan is gg to mesir tmrw.. been crying for quiet a few nights.. ouh allah, kuatkanlah iman ku..

u noe readers,

hazwan hve been always there for me.. we talk,we share,we laugh,we joke we fight,we bully each other,we consult ourselves,we talk to each other abt other cuzzens of us if we feel unhappy and we'll try to make each other feel good.. he's always there wen i feel alone at home during sch holidays and he wld jus come over and help me do the hse chores..layan me do my stuff... urge me to go gym together..masak maggi together.. pujuk me wen i cried..he ever hug me wen i cried badly and let me cry more until i felt better..

and now he's leaving us for abt a year,prolly more than that..

puasa w/o him.. raya w/o him.. gathering w/o him..gg gym w/o him,gg melake w/o him..

i shall stop blogging abt him now before bukit panjang ade flood.. lol? huh!

will miss u dear cuz <3

2011-07-16T02:37:00.000+08:00

i guess im too nice to ppl maybe.. i just cant be that cruel.. i have a heart.. a strong one.. i love my blog.. its been the same blog since 2004? i know there's some friends out there still reading my blog.. distance friends.. tried to blog at tumblr but i guess there still much to learn so i guess i shall stick to this for awhile.. or maybe use both blog.. idk.. ive been busy with working during my june holiday and now sch reopen and im busy with downloading movies.. dah mcm taasub download tau! astarghfirullah.. download2 tk tengok2.. pandai..

ape lagi korang nk tau? tny la k kat tagboard klw ade bnde2 yg krg nak tau.. dont worry insyaallah akan dijawab..

2011-04-20T00:04:00.000+08:00

im not using this blog anymore.. to much spammers and ANNOYING STALKERS!!

takecare readers.. enjoy this life!

wna noe where i move to,simply text me or msn or twitter of fb.. fs w/o name tk lyn ye..

2011-03-20T00:56:00.000+08:00

one more day to sch reopen and im hating my hols... plan nak talaqqi tp dtg bulan...nk tuition tp makcik tkde nk klua tp bgn da lmbt sgt...pendek kate ape yg plan sume tk jd la.. end up ddk uma besarkan bontot... kenz ar eh..haix..

yaumiyat da ikan... feb and march tk buat2 lagi..haiyo...padahal ddk uma..acerly ddk uma yg lg mls...tau tk...

can i say something? wtv...i still wna say this..

i miss cuzzen's outing..its been 2 years now eh?ithink..

i miss SISTERHOOD..yeah u heard me..

i tknk drag nie bnde... tc!

2011-02-28T01:29:00.000+08:00

last friday,i went back hme straight frm sch to buy some stuff for bio project,family's toiletries and to send my laptop for service..ask zakwan to come and join since he always ikan-ing at hme yet he cnt make it so next ikan-ing person always is my cuzzen hazwan..lucky he cn accompany me..he told me he brought another 2 of his friend which i i tot they are the irsyadians..while on my way to the bstp,saw yat at the lift lobby baru turon with another of his friend,we went to our seperate ways and when i was in the bus,later that i noe that they were the one who will be joining..after the whole laptop process was done,went for mkn at alazhar..we laugh and laugh and laugh smpi fi tertumpahkan air kat hazwan..just bcs he said that maher zain was akon's manager last tym...eh? tp klw its the fact pn cm kekek ar...went to pool-ing and cyber games..i manage to defeat dan and that was my 1st serious trial..haha! awesome!had lot of fun tgk drg main CS..my cuzzen seriously pengecot..epic die yg at that last game...klua je sume blame hazwan psl nk terkencing dgn die nye kekek pengecot tu..

went back hme WALKING from BUKIT TIMAH to BUKIT PANJANG..nak dekat 5 bus drive pass us..

dan kua kan alternative baru,jln "short cut" ikot chestnut drive eh?yg penting dat area..gerek ar dpt sightseeing uma2 org kaye..ade da mcm mansion..ade yg ala2 white house.ade yg holland2 type..mcm2 ar..takot jgk klw tk psl2 anjing menyalak..haha! da mcm penyamun jgk sey..psl kte da sesat and kte ikot jln lorong nie..tau2 kat hujung tu ade fences tgi,we climb over sume..from 10pm,kte smpi bp nearly 12.00 2hrs for the whole journey..gile oi!!!!tp enjoy la the journey dgn drg...

well acerly on that day,the whole time spend with them,there's this one person yg name dan tu...he serious shit igt kan fi kat polar bear..seriously gile nye..care die sindir,joke,bbl everything..nasihat die lagi walls,just lyk him...i even said to to my cuz and he agreed..their shape pn same..i mean the time when i get to noe polar bear his shape was exactly the same dgn dan now..we also had the most together moment..i mean we walk together at the front while wan and yat mepek2 kat blkg..and yet,we dont communicate..i just donno wat to talk..and also avoiding acerly..because he seriously resembles polar bear..

lately,my back is giving me a major hard time..sape yg ddk sbela or blkg fi cnfrm kne mintak urut klan bdn..seriosly saket sgt..im sry girls..i need to do check up on that,,makin terok la..ni pn tga saket nie..ouch!

and for my nose too...case tu da mcm forever sey..haha!

was sitting nan shazaa td kat MC aft angklng..she said that she and mateen said that im different now... am i?

they say i dont talk much now?really?enth eh..

sedangkan mase tu berybah..ape lg manusia...haha! i also dont know..fi berubah ke tk ke...pape je k..

da nantok mls nk ckp lagi...

2011-02-24T00:52:00.000+08:00

im posting this because i wna kill the time..im sleepy but i wna chat as well..

its been 3 days not chatting,so now i wna atleast talk abt today..im gna take the least 30min chatting..the most?haha! insyaallah wont exceed to 1.30am..

im excited for tmrw's event..the periods before recess will definitely light up especially preu2 students..

assembly,aerobic then 3 periods of GB! GB has been a the highlight for us every week..previous years we tend to skip our thurs,resting at hoem or mainly just burning yr 10 days 'MC'..

new year new rule new resolution will there be any more MC? lol!

2 more mins to 12.30...come on...im sleepy already..y didnt u ride or drive to work today?huhu~

we've completed 3 of our CA's..cheer la!! haha!

yeay!!!! need to start with balaghah tmrw,nahu on saturday and sarof on sunday...i got to stick with this plan man!!come on fi! work for it!

oi!!! da 12.32 da...mana kamu??!! pfft..

12.40 and still waiting.. :)

12.48 and im patiently waiting......(:

1.00 am.. and ill keep waiting.....

2011-02-14T00:38:00.000+08:00

as all of us noe that this tuesday is valentine day yet not much ppl noe that it's also maulid nabi...

y do muslim teenagers celebrated valentine's day? is it because they dont noe? if they dont,knape yg tau tk nk blg..skrg ade byk pe sumber2 yg bley blg..such as fb,twitter and such..or is it drg tau tp pengaruh kebaratan nie sgt kuat? i tried my best not to layan ppl asking me out to celebrate valentine..tho tarikan die tu memang dasyat ar..lol! anw, i heard, masjid iman is having a maulidurrasul nye sharahan eh? pape la..mcm best..sape nk gy together? jom3!

errrr~ acerly im happy today..not only today la...im having a great week so far this week... *longestbiggestsmile*

heee~ tkpe tkya tau k..ill keep things to myself frm now onwards..sry...

idk wat else to say..maybe i noe tp mls nk ckp skrg..tga enjoy tgk cerita cornetto inikah cinta! best!!

2011-02-08T01:35:00.000+08:00

it is now the 5th week of school..and im exhausted sgt dah..im still yet to have my rest tau..

went to melake on CNY..yeah! again~ lucky i bought alot of things..necessary things such as my dark blue jeans(yg dulu koyak tym cycling with sisters),my compact my moisturizer and etc..im happy coz finally i geot to change my facial wash to a better and definitely the brand theat ive been dreaming to have it,its HIMALAYA baby! like finally..thanks to my sisters for the facial wash set..and mum officially redha kan fi pki himalaya..yeay!

so the trip was okay la cm biase..mmng langsng tkde time rehat..balek sch rush balek rumah siap gy melake..kat sane everyday klua..sume tmpt nk pegy..sume bnde nk beli..last day nk blk sg kne serang sengugut..sumpah nie irritating gile..pk nk gy beli cd byk2 den tgk kat krete..nk gerak kan bdn je da saket..haix..alhamdulilah finally reach sg safely..

the next day pagi2 da kne bgn den kne gy beli brg decoration class..seriously tkde time rest..nie quraan blm hfl2 tau..assingment ade tk buat lg..allah~help me manage my tym well ya allah..

klw nk ckp psl assingment sch tu mmng tk hbs2 so tk pyh ckp k..

i saw this quotes,

When you find the right guy, you'll know because that person will become your reason for getting out of bed in the morning<3
The greatest part of life is finding someone who knows all of your faults & weaknesses, but still thinks you're amazing.
I wanna be the reason why he slept with the phone in his hand because he was waiting for my reply.

after reading this,the only person yg teroz klua kat otak was my ex...the one that i had the longest relationship with..wow!yet that was a few years back..now.. i tell you..its hard to get those sincere,honest feeling..

maybe you can say that we were still young,kental,bla3..but exactly...we can maintain them..2years was alot sey..yet now..you can even lose a friend.. and im soo agree to this quote,

Remember when we were little, we always wanted to grow up? Now we realize it was better being a kid.

im not trying to igt bnde lame then menyesal sendiri..no! tu keje bodoh! all im saying is that makin besar makin mcm2 masuk kat hati sampi kejujuran keikhlasan and other good behaviour/character/attitude makin merosot..agree? haha!

i hate being lonely at night..mcm2 masuk dlm kepale..cte primary pon masuk..kelakar la jgk..tp ade yg rase mcm ish bodoh nye aku gy buat gini3..ish asl boley terserempak die..ish asl dekni ade kat hidop..ish asl dekni aku knl..you n oe bnde2 gini..yg sepatutnya kte shld rase gini, If you want happiness don't walk together with your past. Truth is, the past is only a lesson. Don't bring it back. its just a lesson..

Mistakes makes me human. Failure makes me stronger.lagipun tkde gune menyesal,nasi da jadi bubur..

tp to get rid that out of yr mind especially when ure lonely mmng ssh..so the question here is why?

lol!

thats why now,tho i have lots of activities aft school,even when i reach home i need to go mengajar,im happy to carry all this responsibilities..rather than staying at home,doing nothing,hear those naggings..atleast i do something beneficial,insyaallah jugak ganjaran pahala diberi insyaallah ameen..ddk ruma kje sch mcm tk bley buat..klw boley ddk sch satu hari stakat hbs kn hmwk,seriously i dont mind..

a friend tego fi td..ye la awk nie mcm nk lari kan diri dr saye je..aek busy..well boy honestly im busy..lgpn honestly im not intrested..i love wat im doing now..mmng busy..hp nie org msg sume tk sempat reply..terok kan..tau... all i want to do is to stick with the way i am now and with these friends i have arnd me..most importantly is i dont wna lose a friend.. i have no one else except my frens,tho i have someone else pon,he whoever he is cant seperate me frm my frens..they now me more than he does,whoever he is.haha!

my 2011 was so far a hectic,chaotic yet enjoying all this haywire life, the thing that make me upset the most is that,i lost a fren..a fren that means a lot to me..cant agree more to this quote saying,Sometimes the people we've known for a short amount of time have the biggest impact on our lives, even more than those we've known forever.

but,like i said just now,learn to accept it..take this a a lesson learn.. :))

formspring.me

2011-01-30T15:39:00.001+08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/kayzafirah

2011-01-20T22:19:00.000+08:00

ITS PBL!!!!

PROBLEM BASE LEARNING!!!!

0.0!?!?!

2011-01-17T23:45:00.001+08:00

sry readers!! i noe ive not been updating my blog since last 2 weeks? yeah im really busy ryte now...exhausted too! esp today..i wna sleep now..i cant handle this anymore..tomorrow another long day in school and MUIS afterward till 6pm..wah da mcm ikan sa...today also went hme at 6,school was been visited by japanese students..tot nk do some research on GB and PBL and memories quraan tp serious penat sgt..sry..update you all soon..

trying to reconcile with polar bear back together again..yeah its been soo long..its a long story..we barely even explain our stories/reasons/secret..pray for us will u..wanted to talk to him but he was too tired..i bet another torture for that abg cd..lol! igbs jgk tk bbl..aku pn da penat gile..hoping to meet up soon..really..ive been waiting and holding back since during my 0s..its the time now..

wah! i really to meet my bestie very soon..we hardly communicate! my ppd mls nk topup..he plk busy enrol here and there..tp da book..power ar!haha!

done explaining and make things straight between me and that sergeant guy..haha! yeah ridhwan..so we're fine now..and i prefer the way we are..cool cat! hahk!
he's not feeling well today..pray that he will recover soon k..that sergeant have a lot more work to be done in his camp..

haiya...all of u busy ar..haiyo~ i also busy..kerja sekolah bertambah..yg yaumiyat tk buat2 lg...

PENAT!!! NYTE!!!

lagu primary 4 aku!! kekek ar!!

2011-01-08T16:14:00.000+08:00

alhamdulilah... thank allah for a wonderful birthday yesterday.. i enjoyed every sec till the end of the day..

ill blog abt it soon..now need to go out awhile..

2011-01-05T23:27:00.000+08:00

how and what do you feel wen uve been chased out from yr hse?you may think its crazy but hey..look..im going tru that..dont trust me?haha! i noe u wont..maybe im sad and fumed up at the same time..he said that to me a few minutes ago..now im in my room lying on my bed..feeling all fucked up!idk wat to do now..the moment he said that to me,1st thing in my mind,shld i get out from this hse..then second tot,maybe i shld just tompang awhile,while i get some part-time job and use the money for my daily expenses..lying down in this room make me feel uncomfortable now..make me feel like im not at hme..well i am not..ive been chased out remember! seriously i dont feel nice now..even if tmrw they were to give me my allowance ill feel berat hati to take it..like wow! tenant get some money housekeeper..i dont think i can face them now..i think i rather stay in this room to avoid awkwardness..honestly i cant think!! now i feel very remorseful for not taking up part time job during holiday..but then ive tried my best still i didnt get a single job..aft that lousy job,i was busy travelling to malaysa..holiday la,shopping la,survey my kak sdare wedding stuff la..busy!! shit la wat to do sia now.. if i wna work,where shld that be?wen to work?friday saturday sunday? hows my cca and angklung?how my studies?how to revise?esp during exam,how to study?can i sope with it? do anyone have any kenalan yg nk diajar..saya nk mengajar..atleast mengajar tk la penat sgt and atleast have time to study..i really need to teach..anyone have any kenalan pls pass it to me can? i desperately need it..

maybe i may not have a wonderful birthday this year aft being chased out..
i tot i can have my 18colourful baloons for my birthday..
aft being chased out i felt like my life will be as hard as last year..much harder...
haix...

2011-01-04T01:36:00.001+08:00

6 hours more and ill be in sch by then...

see you friends!! heylo new classmates...see you during lecture old classmate..

was on fb and i saw posts from last year PU2...yeah2..its yr turn..next year insyaallah..ours..and next the seniours...ntg new actually..kinda excited to sch nie..how the changes affect me??i wonder~

new tchs!! but who??can i change one thing? stop sleeping in class...well i need to do that...like seriously...ill make it happen..insyaallah ameen~

the same old menu i guess...haix..somebody plzzz!!make a change!! god!tskk~

im typing this while my eyes half open so hope u understand...cant think now...

*praying*

"ouh allah,in this new year,i pray that ill change for the better...i pray that ill cut the habit of sleeping in class,do things last min and sleep late..i pray that ill be better this year in studies,also as a student daughter a fren and ofcrs to you ouh allah,ill do everything they told me to and never to disobey them..ouh allah,ill keep fighting off my laziness,and being dreamy always and so i pray that u could help me with it..ouh allah,give more energy and strength for my parents whom has been supporting us the whole family..give them health so they could continue build up this family in muslims way...lastly,i pray to you allah,for the peace of the world and for the safety,health,and happiness for ll muslims in this world...ameen allah..."

2011-01-01T19:34:00.000+08:00

wow!! the firework was awesome!!! colourfull!huge!stretch my hand and i cld feel the sparks..it gets bigger and bigger! that was my countdown celebration on 2010..this! -____________________- is this year.... firework cute nak mampos! mcm dr kamstam sg tgk bunge api kat malaysia...di pisahkan dengan sebidang laut..i was at vivo and the firework was at USS and siloso...yg siloso nye mcm bagi ank kucing makan..yg USS nye gerek ar tp since kte jauh nmpk cute je ar..walls tgk tc lg puas...pfffft~

but i had lot of fun afterwards..sheeshaa at mossi then go mkn at bukit timah al azhar at 4am..raihan bwk kete so kte travel2 jgk dlm kete jln jauh..dr hujung ke hujung..best!! hehe..reach hme 5am..ngantok gile!! da la the day before tido 3 hrs je..

today,due to the heavy whether tdo pn lame bgn maseh hujan so i ate cheeseburger and now surf the net waiting for mum to wake up and go tempah baju and alter tudung..at nyte ade kenduri and maybe nk kua jap crk brg...hmmm idk sempat ke tk...

tmrw sisters outing!! and need to buy stuff for sch reopen..

new resolution for this year....

most importantly,just wna be happy....a sincere smile every day..no longer a fake smile...

2nd,pass my preu2..not just pass like i use to achieve but now,with better marks,percentage and possition..

last,be a good daughter,fren,student,cousin, grandchild and ofcrs, be a better muslim..tu paling ar...serious..cuti sch nie jd haywire oi!!!!

k im done here...umi da biseng da....haiyooooo!!!~~

2010-12-31T19:30:00.000+08:00

just done watching music industry exposed on youtube..it's all about media control human like robots..artists represent them...numbers,strawberry,butterfly have something to do with it...its all illuminati..k yes i left far2 behind..i use to watch the arrival but there's 60over episode..and keep repeating the same thing..and some make the story so long and i dont have time for that..so i watch this new video post by farhank..11 episodes altogether but i get the whole picture alr..now im im afraid of those kinda music...lucky im not a fan of lady gaga and i dont listen to rap song..and songs that i find it weird,i wont listen..and i was right..those song that i find the lyrics and video clips was weird do have this illuminati relation..im soo afraid now honestly..

its 6+pm now and im kinda lazy to go countdown..haiyo..

urm....if u are reading this...hey,im sry k..there's alot abt me that u donno..and frankly im weird!! really!! only do things by following wat my heart says..thats not weird but the way how this small heart works is kinda worries me sometimes..ive given u some clue..and u say u understand it well..but im sry..i dont think u really do..i promise ill make it up to u soon alright..pls dont get mad..it gna make it worst..pls....im really2 sry.. i dont wna toying up yr feelings..that matters the most..so i promise ill make it up to u soon..im going for countdown tonite...maybe ecp..just need to chill..i just wna have fun this 2011..this does not mean i nk main kan perasaan anyone..and i dont want that to happen pn...fun here mean,not committed,not even feel like one just going on things slowly steadily..not to think of r/s..FRIENDS jus soo awesome!
if u wna drop by at ecp why not..then maybe we can sort things out..takecare..

will update this blog again soon as i reach hme tmrw insyaallah...

2010-12-28T16:19:00.001+08:00

hey all! im sry for the late update..been busy lately..even wen im at home im busy..busy with television esp tv3..back to back drama them at night movie with my brother,haikal till late night..ofcourse otp 1st with someone..teheee..nah! its the guy whom i dated with last sun..k dah! back to my story! haha! and so yeah thats my routine la..almost every night my dad use my com so i didnt have time to update my blog..

so whats new?

haha! good question...

i cooked! yeah! i did! hahaha!

i cooked sweet and sour chicken..its a christmas gift for a fren..hahaha! yeah! idk wat to give him and he said he really wants it so yeah u get wat u ask for..just like santa :) tskk~

tot of baking apple pie too but i was rushing and the ingredients tkde kat uma...so sweet and sour je la ye..

i got popcorn frm him as a gift too..yeay!! its the delicious scrumptious tasty popcorn ever! the new popcorn in singapore! they only have it at USS and city link..go get yrs today k! haha! rugi tk dpt..the smallest 8bucks tp worth it ar..byk and can mix..i had cheesy smtg and caramel..bunyi je da sedap kan..mmng sedap..hahk!

did i ever tell u abt fi teman zakwan shpg?yeah aku did teman bdk tu shpg...kalah kn org pmpn shpg...satu ari shpg sume n k beli sume kedai masuk tp beli 2 bnde je...aku kne puasa satu hari pkl 9 baru mkn...nasib da teman sni sne die belanja mkn...pndi wat baek..hehe..but still have fun jgk ar klua tu..at1st tkt2 jgk kte due je yg klua cnfrm org pk lain da la the day before kne kcw together.. supposedly safwan ikot tp die paitao! walaw! heart pain sia member paitaw!haiz...but lame2 everything goes fine..

the day before pn kua nan sha n zakwan ali beli kasut kt expo crocs sale..borong crocs habis nye... bought for umi also a high heel sandal..afterward meet safwan sufi ho hakim acap at arb strt..lepak2 kejap then went home...if shisha oso i cannot..nowadays the shisha shop da strict ar...da kne saman dat tym..the nasrin owner told us abt it.. i need shisha!! 10 more days to 7 jan and i really cant wait for that! im legal da!! can buy shisha at my own! hehehehehe! really sia cant wait! but 3 days aft dat 0level result!! tu je mati ar..tsk~

yesterday last min pkl 7mlm dpt call frm acap ajak lepak at town wit mateen..lincah2 siap teroz kua..pki celak je kua..da mcm tk gy town sey..acap bought a porter wallet for 79bucks! porter tau! consider murah sey..

mkn at burger king then lepak kat dpn ion..1st tym lepak situ ddk kat situ..rmi acerly lepak there..mcm esplanade gitu drg lepak..tp kire high end ar lpk kt ion..tsk~ wat only..share some stories together..drg nye kcw pn tk peylat..haix..

today! finally update nie bnde..soon nk tgk putera katak den cuti2 cinta on YOUTUBE! go watch it now!

at night wna watch grown up and my korean drama...byk eh nk buat..so bye now!

sry eh nie post sound boring..tga syok mkn ayam ar...heee sry!

2010-12-20T03:24:00.000+08:00

boo!hahaha! im hyper active today...maybe bcs i laughed alot today...

thanks to mr date! he made me nervous and lastly laugh my belly out..

ouh yeah! so u must be wondering how my date was like ryte...

hahahaha!

i had lot of fun laughing teasing laughing talking...lol!

again,was late...da lmbt then waited for the bus or cab..hoping which ever come 1st will be my ride... nearly 20 mins the bus still didnt arrive..cab also all busy..lucky me..once i stand up and walk further infront,1 cab juz came in..met him at cck cheers...yeah cck! haha! plan to go suntec but i hve to at my aunt's aft asar for a bdae celebrations..and cck shaw movie start at 2.35 so we settle down there...watch let me in...tk seram sgt but terperanjat slalu..and lots of bloood!!!! i hate blood!!and violent too..

aft movie,we go mkn pastamania..decided to eat some light food coz i was going to attend another "pesta mkn"tp mcm phm he go order 1 plate pasta to share and banana pie and chocolate mousse for dessert and the fries thingy as a side order...-_____-" terkial2 hbskn..da la both tk kuat mkn...pfft~ he sent me to my aunt hse at cck so we walk from lot one all the way to her place..that is when we started to get more closer and mesra..haha! hey thats rhymes! haha!

smpi je uma mama sempat tertdo sume...nantok and penat...then blk singgah nyayi hse lg then makteh offer mee rebus lg...lucky i dont eat at mama's if not cnfrm meletop!k now im tired and i need to sleep...make a deal to sleep early today and da promise pn so yeah im turning down soon...dont say i sleep late lg eh..pfft~

anw plz...tkmo pk mepek k ppl...im just be friending him...ntg else in my mind...u noe how ive gone tru...i need a break now..all i need is ntg more than a friend..i need to put myself on the list 1st..yeah im afraid of the past..so im not gna repeat it again..till wen im gna be sgl and be friending just anyone??idk...untill i found the ryte one...untill he who ever he is show the sincerity..now i prioritize me myself and family and friends... :))

p.s im trying soo hard to move on..im trying soo hard to erase u from my mind..i will keep on doing this...everyday...ill try...stronger each day facing this alone..i saw it on yr wall...all the best...gdlck..u must be really happy now with her esp... dont treat the same shit on her not even any other girls after this...treat them well..i noe u can..

another song he gave

2010-12-18T13:54:00.000+08:00

have a date on sunday........!!!! im scared!! teeeeheeeee~ wat to wear????that question been in my head since yesterday....horror movie?? well juz take care aite boy!u really wna watch horror movie ryte even if i embarrass u at the cinema...so,be prepared k...tsk~ k wat to wear???!! eerrrrr~

k wat song for this post??wat song wat song??!! errrr~ urgh! i cant think now! shoot!

2010-12-17T00:11:00.000+08:00

again..things doesnt go as plan... i did ntg today...the same mundane activity...but im sure im going out tmrw coz i cnt stand another day at home anymore....3 days at home is my maximum..hahk!msg received for tmrw's activity...i wna go karaoke and some tough activity...plans plz!!!need to plan wat to wear tmrw...

meanwhile,listen to this song..

i dont understand this person who gave me this song coz it remind him of me..yet now he left..he's gone..with no sign.. how i feel abt that? hurtful and clueless.. definitely hating this feeling of wanting to noe from him coz im not gna do that..had enuf..been the one always to come back and settle things..if he care he wld come..he dont so wat more can i say...but if he dont care then y gave me ''soo much" such as song that remind him of me.. a fact from his friend,ppl change.. and that remind me of the tym wen he left and i started to act more of me and he was scared coz he tot ive change..so now who changed? look yrslf in the mirror okey.. and i still remember that u stil have the guts to say that u will never leave a girl clueless..that is so not u..but hey! are you trying to prove me anything here? remember,ill never forget any promises..u can run but u cant hide..coz i noe anything and everything..im not a bitch..so i let things happen and dont go out and hunt that person down.. im gentle u noe:) teheeee~

acerly there are more of this kinda song..ill let u noe next tym aite... :)

2010-12-16T03:19:00.000+08:00

damn im listening to this since today...idk y but im stuck at this..

and now it remind me of my time with my ex fahmi....

we love techno trance and those type of songs...

plan with bestie to watch rapunzel but im being soo big ass..im soo lazy...

sit at home..sleep late and woke up late too..i dont really eat alot..esp rice..been sitting infront this lappy and tv vice versa...lucky we bought lots of new movies,pirated and some even free...so its a midnight movie everyday..and now planning to go jb again and buy more cd...im addicted to it..

planning to do some clean up tmrw morning then go mengajar then get the ingredients for my apple pie...yum!

i really hope i can make this happen..

alright till here bye!

2010-12-14T03:24:00.000+08:00

slept from 8am to 3pm...cleaned up and sha went home alone...get dressed while waiting for hafiz nawas..went out for dinner and movies,unfortunately were late aft having dinner and the cinema has closed..walked all the way from cck to bp...bestie was soo excited to see train KTM moving infront him...sat under my voideck and have some chat and a moment of truth...had fun & love the bond...

sleepy now but dont wna turn down coz i wna watch 3 idiot...suppose to return the cd today but i still havent watch yet..so gna extend it till tmrw..borrowed a book just now and now cant wait to read it and finish it soon and get my next book..miracle just happen to me maybe tonite...

parents home now...i wna go out with polar bear this fri or sat...hope can make it..nothing else to say..gdnyt..

2010-12-13T07:44:00.000+08:00

i just came back..went somewhere to release this thing that ive been holding on to for mths..

enuf of fake smile,laughter,joy...ive finally come to the point where i moved away from ppl arnd and ran to the toilet for some cried out mission..it was rude but i hurt more...

the song tercipta untukmu was played,a sec after i saw u directly at the corner...was eating at that moment suddenly i just stop and had no appetite to continue at all..ive tried to cool down but the more i stay in the CC the more that i wna cry so i went out to take some fresh air...

abt to go home..met chacha at that corner where i noe u were not there..chat awhile with some frens too..

suddenly u came to salam them before going back home...i was stagnant..i just dno wat i shld do...by looking at that footwear of yrs,my heart keeps beating rapidly in an increasing manner..

friends told us to look at each other...but i noe im not strong enuf to look into yr eyes aft wat u done...

leaving me clueless...told me to wait for the right time for you to talk to me...yet,its been a mth now...and the fact is im still waiting...

yes im mad for wat u did...for how u ill-treated me...for how u make me feel this shit!..i hate them!

but i noe the care that i have for u are much2 stronger than my hatred...

yes i acted so well...not to care abt u...not to think abt u even a millisec..act like im over u and having soo much fun now with frens family even wen im alone...

but honestly i failed to do so!!

i noe i shldnt cry for all this shit! i noe i shldnt even care..but wat can ppl do to me...because i still do care for everything!and anything!

ppl came to me selambe nye jus ask me how _ _ _ _

all i can reply is,shut up! its really painful to get that from ppl...not because i hate it...its because i feel the pain juz by a question...

maybe u dont and ppl dont care and noe how i feel towards u...maybe im blinded...but somewhere deep inside i noe smtg abt u that keeps me holding on...or maybe bcs i deeply care for you till i dont care of any possibilities...

i just can say anthing now...i dno how to end this post...the feeling is hanging..and im leaving this post hanging too..im talking crap now coz im not asleep since 7am..

2010-12-04T19:37:00.000+08:00

its been turbulent week for me...

ton at east coast aft sending wan wahab off..

flea then slept over sha's..

went shopping with mummy,sha & aunty sassy..

to school for books & movie just before midnight then..

school again and shopping with family..

that night perah otak for an outing the day after..

two days rest at home..

now waiting for dad and off to jb,kl and melake..

overall i enjoy my holiday w/o work..

hoping for more fun at malaysia soon..

waiting with much enthusiasm..

pictures are now in fb for the outing....thanks to nurul ain nabilah:)

was watching a malay drama and this words caught my attention...

no matter wat,i will never leave you... ='(

that only happens in drama..reality? you are lucky to have one...

im done blogging here...

will blog next week soon as i sat on this bed..

2010-11-29T04:10:00.000+08:00

haha! if u realise (those who read my previous post before) i acerly change the song...well demi song doesnt really suit the whole situation and yeah i dont really like the song...k u guys have yr own opinion so that's just MY opinion aite.. im not the mood to blog today..but wat i can tell u that im finally home since yesterday afternoon... supposedly went to scape flea but i was late coz syair drop by my hse awhile,luckily sha was there early so she browse the whole flea thing and ntg was intresting so i was lucky enuf to get that news just before reaching town so drop off smwhr near cairnhill and took bus to haji lane nye flea there..got myself hairbands and a yellow vintage beg for 20bucks..acerly im not really satisfied with wat i buy unless the strap is longer but wtv it still look nice..ill try to figure out how to match it with my clothes..met alot of familiar faces and was overwhelmed to see snh and yan while on our way to pastamania..met zakwan and syazana aft lunch and walk back to haji lane to meet acap and mateen..

the guys help acap shifting the stuff to ellisya's while the girls had our great time in one of the shops there..atleast sha felt better coz she bought herself kinda faded shirt that she has been searching for since ages.tsk~

headed to tamp teman acap but wan and sya blk..bodek my mum abit and finally sleepover at sha's..

was at town today with sha,mummy and aunty sassy..layan kan mak dara dan anak dara shopping..hehehe~

had a great time despite my uneasy feelings and unbalanced mood and difficulties in breathing...

last night i was madly in pain..stomach ache..really bad..and today i guess it all..no wonder..and maybe that's the cause..haha! baru pk nk gunting rambot..haiya~

seriously,since went swimming with the girls i had a breathing problem..i mean i always have that but this tym still going on and tk heal2 pn..mesti ade je dlm satu hari tu...y ar? risau la...

mcm phm tknk blog tgk tu bukan main panjang..hahaha! nie pon summarise byk jgk..

k nk tdo bsk busy!!

been getting stories,question from many yet random ppl..i cant take it anymore..get a life k dude!

2010-11-27T04:53:00.001+08:00

bad news again...fuck to chateau de sable..heard that?! not happy come here!pffft~

let me tell you my story...

it was my FIRST day of work..i only have cashiering experience..came earlier than manager,infact,earlier than anybody..manager arrived and told me to do wat morning shift employer supposed to such as vacuuming and tidy the shop..check! next she briefed me abt the cashier-ing there to check whether i remember or not..check! i love that part coz i remember it clearly.afterward,i learned how the clothes were arrange and etc..check!..then the customer arrived and i cld juz say welcome and help with little stuff here and there coz i still noe ntg there but i think to me im good enuf to try and look for the sizes the customer requested tho im totally unfamiliar with the store..i noe nothing abt that store but i try to look for clothes..and i was lucky enuf that the dress was place right infront of me as i step in the store room..when i didnt noe i ask my manager but she seem not to favour that..but who cares..she dont teach me abt the store thing at all!!i was the one approach her saying that i find myself difficult to get stuff in the store..yet she still continue with her 'job' kat deckstop tu.. pffft~

lucky her assistant came aft that 3hrs...she teach me how the store is organize but the point here is she teach me in an orderly manner which is hard for me to pick up..so wat i did was that when theres no customer around and during my break,i acerly look tru the shelves in the store room and figure out myself how the clothes is arrange by sizes orderly... being independent for my FIRST day of work kire bagos oi aku!!! -_-"

mcm fuck je...urgh!

there's only 5/6 colour clothes je which is blue,pink,beige,white,grey,limited purple and red..yet each cloth has different design and not all design have all the above colours..some may/not have..and when customer ask me wat other colour this certain cloth has?? 0.o??? how am i supposed to noe!! its my 1st day of work! and when i ask the manager/assistant to help,they kinda irritated..cb nye chinese!

"what's the new arrival for dresses??"dutch lady.. fuck ar! new arrival pon ko tk blg yg mane??

tk helpful at all sey!! ape gune amek manager gini sa!! assistant pon satu kepale..org gini pon boley kje under kau??! and luckily the next day tk kje so i went for netballing with the netballers then me maya yan and ain went to anywhere our feet leads us...we do some job hunting too..suddenly secara sial nye dpt msg saying dear zafirah its a regret to inform u dat u are not suitable for the job..we are sorry and gdlck!well at first i wasnt really mad then i replied that i, fine but i juz need to noe my mistake so i can learn from it..

guess wat??! no reply!! ape sa maksod! next msg i sent "no reply for that??" still no reply...

than my heart shout BUTO la! nmpk sa tknk aku coz from the start nk buat keco psl tudung padahal i saw one of their employee case da lame kje sane melayu pki tudung...tknk tknk je la..treat aku mcm gitu..bodoh sia!! walls aku bingget pk2 balik..but wtv better now..hahk!

sent wan wahab off to syria last night...ton @ east coast with sha ali raihan zakwan hafiz who acerly made it till this morning..ho and mateen went home at 3 am ++..\

must be wondering right how come from airport to east coast??pfft~

acerly danial and sufi bwk kete so this ppl above + hammet naek kete drg while ho bwk moto then headed to sempang bedok...i dont really like wat i eat coz maybe nowadays i dont really favour rice but i really like wat zakwan was eating..the roti john was supper sedap!!

then drg pon anta gy kte2 yg ton gy east coast...reached home at 9am sleep till 4pm..pffft~

k now nk sambung tido...adios..

fyi my lappy buat hal..nnt bile da on trz off and on balik sendiri then kne choose 4 options..safe mode,safe mode and networking,safe mode and smth else and normal start up..

normal start up nnt die nye on off automatically tu akn berterusan..

safe mode tk ley masuk internet...

safe mode and networking boley internet tp speaker tk ley pki..

safe mode yg lgy satu tu tk tau plk...haiyo!! need to go for repair la!! mane nk anta?! masalahnya duit sape nk pki?! haix....

drama sey sume..da nk tido nyte!

enjoy la lagu nie yg aku sendiri pena dgr lagu nie tp da lupe skrg da tk igt cmne lagu die and tk ley dgr...huhu~

2010-11-23T02:30:00.003+08:00

im not tired acerly...im just lazy...damn freaking lazy..i dragged myself to browse the tiny-big shop...

its a tiny shop for customers not for the workers..its have only pink,light blue,dark blue,grey,beige,limited purple and red..yet they have thousand different kind of design..the worst part is u shld roughly noe wat colours they have for each design which some may or may not have dat diff colours...u understand..hope u do coz i dont..-_-" sickening...but wat to do..have to work..no money no talk..haix...jus felt like working at the starbucks nearby,atleast it's near to my hse and i love coffee..when u have passion it something u gna love wat u're doing ryte..i envy armani kids shop opp...there only 1,2 customers came in..unlike mine..one perseon came in then the rest will follow..urgh! i just wish then there are no more stock so my job gna be easier...haha!

lucky its juz 7/8 hrs of working..1 hr of break in between..or else im gna die!! popular last tym have to stand at one place move a little bit here and there for 10/11 hrs...siow! reached home with cramps here and there..tmrw no mood already to go to work..journey on the bus always got no seat..atleast this tym more possitive than its negative...5bucks per hour? okey la can survive la..atleast something rather than nothing...

i cant wait for my holiday!!! 2days in kl and 2 days in melacca and also 1 day in jb...can take leave tk??wah scarry ar...if kena buang how??somehow bagus jgk tp byk tk bagus la...ah! wtv holiday tetap mau holiday! 0s habis ma...y am i talking like chinese ar??urgh! influenza!!choi!

tmrw netball!!! and im still blogging...i think aft netball atleast 5/6 reachd home ar...then i need a lot of sleep...im kinda miss my life where i always sleep at 4 am..mostly 6..haha!

and when can i watch my hot korean drama???mummy!!! i want iphone for my birthday can or not!!??

ouh yeah forgot la...congrats to those who pass their exam...those who didnt well try again next year k..

never klua skola tau k...u will realise that u have much more choices to make aftward..ala nnt krg da at my stage u will feel how lucky u are..betol!!

my result was suck ar acerly tp alhamdulilah pass cume rbk ar...i need to strive next year! need to push myself!graduate dok! wah so fast..next year cnfrm lagi cepat..next year class kekek pe...full of kekek crap ppl..harap2 class tk se stress mcm dulu2 nie and tk senang nantok ar...hehe~

ape lg korang nk aku ckp??hahk! k da tkde idea...gy tido sudah k...slmt mlm...

wah thurs ton!! mau gerek...miss my frens..i smell cheese cake..hehe~

fi asek dgr lagu nie je hari nie..otw to work,tmpt kje,tga break,otw home...ape sey maksod! pffft~

2010-11-18T02:25:00.000+08:00

the song you gave...

can i give it back to you...and never to gave me back...uve walk miles away now...keep on walking and never turns back..i dont wna see u turn yr back..keep on moving..eventhough u left me with no words juz rejections of my calls and a msg that tells me that ure not ready to talk,just go...ill manage myself..is not that i never can manage myself before this when you always not around..the diff now is u are no longer around..ill try to fix myself with my current situation..even if i have to put on a fake smile everyday.. =))

2010-11-18T02:03:00.000+08:00

hey blog...i've been not fine since last night..
the truth was i got wobble-d last night and puke da mcm air klua dr fire extinguisher...not just from my mouth but tru nostrils as well...how's that hah!TERIBBLE!!!not once! pfffft~

today im having difficulties to breath..hard time to breath properly...

been thinking like am i gna die am i gna die..pffft~

anw thanks mateen for teman aku gy interview and dinner yesterday...and thanks to ho for being craaazzaaay together aft mateen went home..been spending my days with my beloved friends nowadays..

tmrw excursion with my classmates..cant wait for that..lame tk jmpe krg each..hopefully i will feel much better tmrw..smlm wobble muntah2..nari mcm nk muntah and wobble cket..bsk insyaallah ok ar..tgk trend die mkn kurang getting baik so ya lor..

sy nak beli mp3 la!! acerly nk Iphone la tp mahal sgt..bill sy tk brani la...

mcm nk i touch je...tp tkde duit..keje da apply da byk sgt tmpt da..tgk tkde respond je sume...so bsk wtv je ar sy nk try quensway and ikea...sapa mau join gua???hahahaha!yeah hopefully any of my sisters ley tmn la bsk...

k la sy kte tdo...td the whole day raya baring kat uma pakwe and nyayi...smpi trtdo pon..kk...

eh jap dgr2 bsk jepon dtg eh?cm gerek aja...hmmm...next year je la ku layan bnde2 gni..insyaallah...

2010-11-16T03:43:00.000+08:00

im not in the mood to blog..well acerly i just dont want unnecessary stuff to be post up here..im afraid if i blog more then ill go deep at that unnecassary stuff..and thats not good..im keeping it to myself as long as i can take it..and ill try my very best to keep it with me...

went to school for bio project..u guys must be wondering y there is still BIO project aft 0s is over..

its acerly our fault too..we postponed it and now we promise that we'll come back for the project..

lembu diikat dgn talinya manusia diikat dgn janji...aft school went to arab strt with yan mai rab sha..

afterward,at abt 5pm i've reach home..mom bought ayam percik! met ho at 7+pm at town area..he accompanied me for job hunting..then acap join us at 9+pm..we bought dunkin donats from ion at sat at mac cafe wheelock and bought nice double chocolate and ice caramel macchiato..talk talk and talk untill it was 11+ and its time to go..

i just had mee siam free from syafiq,i guess its for the katam sanad thingy..2 ayam percik and donuts..

sometime i dont even realise that i dont eat anything the whole day...i cant see rice for nearly a month now..i felt like wna puke like that..

reached home and watch pisau cukur at astro ria and we are family hindustan movie..just done watching that..sad movie...really u guys have to watch it...

i was crying then i remembered that u texted me wen u cried watching a malay movie...then i cried even louder..and how i wish things were as.....

2010-11-15T03:36:00.000+08:00

kan da cakap..org ada cara aku pon ada cara...

tkmo main api kan da ckp..kenape degil..skrg diri dlm perangkap..lu nk lari mana bro?

lu main sala org la bro..

kan aku da ckp aku tk mcm pmpn lain...

which part of the sentence yg ko tk phm...

susah hidop ar lu..

sisters i need to see you girls soon...very soon...ada hal cket mau bbl ar..haha!

i cant wait to go to school tmrw...rindu..haha! k no songs for today..i tk dpt lagu yg kne dgn jiwa skrg..

lagu sume cinta cintan..haix...lol!

2010-11-14T02:15:00.001+08:00

saya tk ego...even tho i tried to hide ignore and deny i still cant do it..bcs im not an ego kinda person..

am i too kind?idk..am i too soft?and that refers to my heart..

ive tried not to think of you but every sec is juz you..

i deliberately talk and laugh out loud coz i cant have any silence..

voices in my head even wen i talk to ppl or laugh or jus anything..

do it loudly somehow works on me coz i dont hear the voices in my head..

so,its been 2 days of fun,enjoyment..

and wen i was on the road i tend to sing some song with frens while taking a video of it..

i dont really care wat the crowd think as long as no voices in my head..im fine..

but luckily we wasnt really in the crowd..td je but not really a CROWD la..yesterday pon was supper dupper sunyi gitu sengkang..so yeah..

i need places like town..places yg bising..so i wont hear voices..thats wat i need now..even at home i cant live if the music is off..i nvr sleep while hearing to my songs but this time i need it..

i can be alone but with some kekecohan at the surrounding..

pelik?yeah....

missing you...i juz cant deny that..im sorry..

was with kila mira the whole day..half day where ifa join us..a few minute with sha and mummy wen all of them went home..first angklung class...felt kaku like that..setahun sey..but yeah get to overcome that..

then to popeye before heading to flea at f1 pit..

sume da crave for chicken..burok gile..met a couple whom i noe and another couple with their group of fren on our way to popeye..flea gerek..tp tk murah sgt..but i get like the cheapest thing gitu...i felt soo lucky today..5bucks for a brown vintage shoe and a rasta like bag for 4bucks..

padahal aku yg ckp siang2 tk beli pape aku yg dpt brg dulu..funny!

afterwards,job hunting for fun....we try our luck je..tp nmpk cm ley dpt sey..haha!

angklung tk rmi turon ar..mcm paitao je sume..urgh!!tu psl tk byk cte psl angklung..

tmrw job hunting again with kila mira and ain..cant wait la..

FI NAK KARAOKE LA!!! PHM TK!! JOM!! SY NK NYANYI MCM ORG GILE! HA!HA!

2010-11-13T04:00:00.000+08:00

its here and there now..even beside u...well,u cant live w/o it..there's always rainbows arnd you..but maybe not for you..you just have to ignore it and look at the bright side..evethough the bright side is not very bright for you..

just cherish every moment..there must be a reason behind everything that's happening arnd you..you just have to look deeper..and soon ull find the ans..u need a key to success..u just have to keep finding it..ofcourse its not gna be easy..ntg in this world is easy..u have to go tru hell before heaven...maybe some of you are soo lucky to get the highway to heaven..but dont feel intimidate..maybe god gave u some test so that u'll appreciate it more..

he wont test you smtg that u cant take it..he will always test you to wat you're capable of..and if u think u really cant make it you acerly just need a little push and a little more effort to carry on with the job..

you just have to tell yrslf that u can do it and work on it..and dont always laugh yr belly out once you get it..coz sometimes its just gna be another test for you..a smile is enough to show u're thankful and appreciate it..

coz im afraid,if u laugh yr belly out u end up tears-ing yr eye out..and thats not good..totally..

whatever it is god is always and forever will be with you...you just have to open yr heart big enough to see the light coming tru you..trust him coz he noes the best for you..and only from him u came from and to him u return to..

ignore the grammatical error..understand the message that im trying to share..i wrote this all by myself with the experience that ive gone tru..the idea came as i was typing..all the best for yr life readers...

alhamdulilah...finally 0s are over...3 years preparation sey..and finally!!

but yeah i dnt mind retaking really..somehow its part of my plan..

my life will change starting from tmrw insyaallah...

angklung training is back! for a year been not playing it not even attend any of the training lesson and now finally im joining angklung back..so life gna change coz im no longer free on sat..only in the morning and aft angklung...then,im gna find job like sooner giler nye..money depleting habis nye...

got to get the money for license especially and savings..

life aint easy no more..need to help out abit..

life this year is and experience year for me..i really experience alot abt ppl and life and learn more abt the ppl in the world..it's been since january 2010 my life change gradually..

thanks to all the ppl who are involve..who i've met along the way..who taught me alot abt life..who acerly make me realise that there are thousands diff attitude and ways of each individual..

those expected and unexpected..those who cares and those who dont..those who have a heart and those who dont own one..again thank you fro the bottom of my heart..

and appologies for all the mistake ive done..i noe i ever hurt anybody's feeling out there..im sry..really..

friends may come and go easily..but the one who stays mean alot to me..and i hate loosing frens..i never wna lose any of friends..and this year means alot to me coz i really make friends with really a huge no. of ppl..

once u're a friend to me all try not to make you upset..

and those who i did that to you on purpose or not..im sry..maybe i didnt realise that..and maybe u went over my limit..but again i never regret having any of you,my friend...i treasure u as much as u treasure yr love ones..

sorry and thank you...

swimming with girlfrens were awesome!!

rab,frh,skin,mai,mya,yan,snh,shz,sha,ain,sya,syair <3<3<3

pictures on fb tells everything...go and check them out..

and so gdnyte world..

2010-11-12T03:42:00.000+08:00

inilah inspirasiku..inilah yg membantu ku..inilah yg kini sedang ku pegang teguh..ini telah menjadi tiang yg ku sandar padanya..

2010-11-12T03:30:00.001+08:00

was listening to this song suddenly idea came so i immediately grab my lappy and go blogging..

and so..today..its not any ordinary day...

its just my day...

i felt very sloppy-ish today...i wore P.E uni with slipers on..idk wat i was thinking..till i boarded the bus then i realised my slenge-nest..no tym to went back home luckily a brought t-shirt along so i get it change..

i was already in ct hall from 11a.m.. dragged mysefl to juz anywhere my feet leads me to..

untill i reached marina square mac and im tired of walking plus my shoulder was hurt bcs of the heavy weight backpack..

i sat there all alone looked at ppl ard me..yeah bussiness ppl were around..

took my stuff out and start my lesson..

chem..thats all i did for the past 7 hrs there..

when i was eating a couple beside me having soo much fun till i cant continue studying..not bcs they were making too much noise,but the fact that they are happy envy me..

well they are funny and friendly too..

they wigh me all the best for my chem tmrw..at that very moment i realised i am really alone..

i then headed to the mall..went in only fav shop juz to look arnd..the to the esplanade and sat at one side..lucky it was not a sunny day and i dont have to suffer with the heat..

the weather was soo fine...a little drizzling but juz for a moment..

i sat there at 1st thinking nothing,jus smiled to the environment around me..then frens,family,life,fate came in mind..to avoid from any tears rolling down i took out my chem and started to revise again..

it was six pm and so i went to the library to get my fav hot chocolate at the library's cafe..

looking at the price i juz tot of not buying..i donot want too many small change..i juz sat there and charge my lappy while im on fb..

i walk all the way to the rooftop gazed at the scenery from every edge..

and then i went back home..

i do enjoy today acerly..it gives me a peace of mind..and i noe i need it..it has been awhile...

2010-11-10T18:05:00.000+08:00

hola readers!!

if u realized most of my posts will always end with music video..

well acerly thats for me and readers..

lazy to put playlist then boring tukar2 upload here and there..leceh..so i put music video at the end of my post and wen i read each post i play on the music also..

mood swayed together..lagi mcm gerek nk bce..

thats for me la..haha!

the main reason is malas to upload playslist but still cant leave w/o music..enjoy my lame blog aite..

2010-11-10T17:59:00.000+08:00

i cant believe that i acerly ask the bonch abt it..

i start the convo..

tired tau bonch..

but hey it works..abit tho..wtv i juz need the ans nothing else..

i need sheeshaa!! like addicted like that..only happen when im like this..pfft~ no money..want to matau wit me??

wtv still im going out...come on text me fast..

2010-11-10T01:15:00.001+08:00

i love this show!!.all time favourite childhood show...i woke up early in the morning just to watch this show everyday.but now its getting harder for me to wake up early...idk y...liyat nye nauzubillah...

i wld like to delete some part of this song and take the only 1st2 part je..lol!

hmm...

plan to study kat lua nari..tp bgn lmbt den got migraine den so lazy to klua so i just stayed at home..

i organise my stuff and delete stuff from my lappy..

delete unwanted msgs..

talk abt msg i get this shocking yet hilarious msg from my 1st ex..like wat???!!! i noe...but again i dont want things to repeat so ignore is the best move..

im planning to wake up early tmrw...den go somewhere then do my chembio..td buat 2 years each je..migraine tating ar..smpi kat mata..

i wna watch glee now the sambong secret life..haha!

i miss you but i shld not..

2010-11-09T02:26:00.001+08:00

i've always wanted to cook breakfast for you..

to pick u up from work..

to meet u every sunday..

to give u lots of surprises..

to make u happy..

to make you feels that somebody really love you..

but i guss thats just my dream..

2010-11-09T01:36:00.002+08:00

i guess my previous post was all abt throwing tantrums kan..

yeah i noe..

everybody have their limits..

aku tk main baju nye type tk puas hati nk hang sini sane..

i dont wna disturb my frens who are tired of hearing to my lousy stories..

fb twitter tu sume msh baru msh bley jage lg...

but come on..ive been using my blog since i was 11..

everything is written here..

i cant change my style for someone..you have to accept me the way i am..

i wont post unnecessary event or post here..

i wont make a big fuss over a tiny thing..

but u went over my limit i wen over my limit also.. u cant accept me,then leave me and leave this blog..

if u still wna spread things then wait for mine..

i dont do any harm to ppl...

tk kuase pon nk buat hal sini sane...

im not that type..its not my thing..

i had enuf pleasing ppl here and there..

i need my life my freedom too..

salam...

2010-11-09T01:28:00.000+08:00

how do you feel if u was told that a groups of ppl say u tk peylat??

bdk nie ade cket tk peylat..can u handle her??

FUCK LA!

krg mane nye baik mane nye tk peylat...nk ckp tu gy pk diri tu dlu la..

and nk ckp tu ko cukop knl ke dgn bdk tu??tkkn...

satu je...

hal kau hal kau..hal aku hal aku..

tk pyh nk kecoh nk lancaw nk spread..perangai tkmo cam bapok ar..

and blog twitter fb is PERSONAL tu that person..

they post stuff to SHARE aje..

but NOT to SPREAD kan to those who dont even noe it..

fb and twitter is privatised and only friends can view..the one who are not their frens wont noe anything..

and there's a PERSONAL reason y they did so..

so those who noes abt that person smtg tk pyh nk spread the news to the whole world...

secare tk langsung u cause alot of disaster to that person..

sendiri nye kain jage sendiri sudah la..

blog is just the way they express their feelings...

private tk private pon tu they have their personal reason..

still u dont have to make a big fuss out of it..

bile kene kan diri sendiri tau binnget tau geram..mulot sendiri tk tau jage suro org jage mulot org..

skali warning da bagi bro...

tp buat lg..

rahsia kau tahsia kau rahsia aku rahsia aku..

ko suro aku diam aku diam..tp klw ko over limit aku ko pijak kepale aku..sry bro..

this is life..

revenge is the game..tk ya nk world nye step gerek ckp tk main revenge ar..

da kasi mesti kasi blk pe..

wats the diff??

get a life bro...

2010-11-09T01:07:00.000+08:00

alhamdulillah.....good news received yesterday...

da decide pon wat to do next...

im gna stay in aljunied and berazam to graduate next year insyaallah...

im soo overwhelmed smpi terpekik kat busstop..

buat malu je...

alhamdulilah..doa dikabulkan...

so,i went to khairuddin's wedding(abg rab)

i was late as usual...it took me 30mins to just pki tudung..tating giler tudung wat hal..

thanks to sha,yan,snh,ain,frh krane tgu i...

we headed to maya's afterwards..

da mls nk blk decided to sleep there..

but i now i cant if i dont go anta arep to mesir so my genius idea,i bring along sha and yan then saw my mum and told her that im planning to sleep at maya's and sha and yan came here to teman then go maya's hse together..

since they were there i noe mum cant say no...hehehehehe..

licik tk...lol!

we watch PK then talk abit then karaoke at 4am..

i guess we slept at arnd 5+ i think...

mcm 0s da hbs eh..bile tdo sane risau jgk psl 0s tp bile da blk tk buat pn...so ill say that its not a waste to tdo sane ar...

we were just soo crazzy to nyanyi such songs like issabella..tutop mulot with bantal konon tk bising..padahal kte pekik se kuat hati..

i really miss last night...

at least wont be feeling this shit now...

reached home at 8 with lousy feeling..

urgh!!!

da smpi uma mlm2 gitu bukan lousy da gone case da..mcm hoping ade kedai sheesha bukak 24/7 den pegi smpi bsk pagi...

haiyo~ pk aft 0s life wld be better...

yeah world....fug!

urgh....

i need a job!!!!!

2010-11-09T00:28:00.000+08:00

im sorry but this post will be a harsh one..really...not good to read...its another tantrum here...

1stly,can i fuck sickening ppl..fuck them hard can i?

then i tie them with a rope and hang them at ceiling fan..

next ill cut their uhuh with a saw but first gna cooked it.

damn sickening assholes..

its been nearly a year now and girls still going tru the same shit..

2010 is a miserable year for me...

i need to be wen i was 15/16 enjoy and nothing to worry about...

other ppl may or may not noe abt it..

the most impt thing is they dont give a damn abt it...

sometimes i just wna isolate myslf..

tha'ts y i ever post on my fb that why are there boys in this world...they cause too much problems..

im not saying this because of my prob but other ppl around me who are going tru this shit!

coz i noe how it feels..

singapore nie kecik..

our school lagi kecik..

tu je gua bley ckp..chey! kan da fana....

come on guys dont make me start my fana lyf where i can shout at any guys as i wish with no mercy...

im getting more girly nowadays so u ppl are lucky coz once im mad ill cry..and ull never see me in no mercy term..

but..it can still happen coz its part of me acerly..it will come out once im vigorously fumed up...

dont try my patience..i had enuf with life this year...

its horrible terrible horrendous year..

agree??

YES!!!!!

marah nie!! in no time i can be like i use to..i can start on things ive stop..and ill be rebellious as ever...
im nearly 18 now...the year that ive been looking forward to..
where i ever tot of doing something more crazy..
the year where i think my freedom berkembang..
the year where im gna do things that are restricted to..
but that was 4/5 years ago..
but somehow it can happen if life continues this way..
seriously i ever azam for something to be done wen i reached 18 but that azam was deleted coz as days goes by im learning alot abt the do's and the dont's..
thanks to my tchrs and frens...they help me alot...
but things might happen if im getting too stressed up..
fuck why im telling all this..y im saying all this..urgh sickening...
nowadays org main teroz terang je da tk main sembunyi2..
sembunyi2 lambat ar..kehidupan nie makin maju...sume nk cepat..
so,get it? hah!
im done perah-ing here..
im thinking wat to do next..bye all..

2010-11-07T04:20:00.002+08:00

i cried! everytime i cry when i think of this!i cried everynight!

will i get to see my frens again next year?

will i get to be in a new class together?

or is it in different classes?

or is it in different level?

do i have to stay if i didnt get promoted?

should i stay?

should i just leave?

if i leave then i have to sacrifice my dreams..

dream to graduate with my frens..my frens that i noe them since my 1st day of school..

dream to get the certicate after 11years in aljunied..

dream to achieve my goals..

i cried because of three things everynight now a days...

2010-11-06T22:58:00.001+08:00

im feeling soo peace at a moment today....

im done veet-ing den apply on body shop lotion that makes my skin feel much softer...ahhh!! i feel like licking myself..0.0!

pfffft! ofcourse not..siow sia like dat!!

before that i cleaned up my room, rearrange my bed and furnitures then my final touch was my favourite part...CANDLES!!

now im sitting on the floor in my room in between candles and i see the flame gerak2 from the reflection..

its raining now...so the soft cold wind really make me sway to the 70s 90s on my playlist..

im feeling all retro now..fyeh!

im doing soo not fine now..really..gosh! wat a life..wat a fate...wat a....okey done..

shit my playlist is now on "bila waktu telah berakhir" by opick..its abt the end of the world and got smtg abt frens and stuff..

im looking forward till tmrw...meeting my sisters..well im missing them alot actually..hmmm....

and missing sumone too..idk how long this will end..im hoping for better life for us each day..and it has been months now..its still the same.. :(

wtv i need to cheer up so i wna see my frens TMRW! okey girls..and missing the others too..

eh serious nie playlist nari kurang asam giler..die main lagu mad plk..delete baru tau...pfft!

im done watching playful kiss in juz 3 days..haha! then today wat i did was juz being a couch potato watching lots of hindustan..lucky today is deepavali got the chance to watch all this..

anw to all indian hindu out there HAPPY DEEPAVALI!!!

i wished my 2nd ex too..haha! thats funny..if only i can wish to my 3rd ex too..

k..hahaha!

im loving my room ar serious..haha! wah~ wat else to say now??no idea..i shall stop now...

2010-11-02T05:12:00.003+08:00

i manage to not update my blog untill aft 0s well acerly 0s aint finish yet..left with two more papers and im done..the coming paper will be on wed and then 9 more days to science paper one..

meaning ill be partying aft bio paper 2..hahk! party? i mean by having fun eh..tsk~

i tot of retaking my 0s in 2 years time atleast..i juz felt that i didnt have much time for this year paper tho i noe its my fault for slacking all the time..i did tried my best for every paper but im aware that i can do better..wtv juz wait for the result..

but 75% says im retaking it..but maybe ill be taking higher malay,maths,pure chem, and english..maybe pure geog,arab and irk..haha! still thinking whether to take either A maths or POA..

i need to make a survey..i need ppl to help me with this...really!.

next,school exams!!!!

hahahahahahahaha! errrrr~

i have the capability to fail my preu1..seriously but nauzubillah lah..

but i just have that strong feeling...

i really didnt want to stay back another year and study all subject again plus sec 4 subjects..gone crazzy oi!

i dont mind promoted to preu2/3 really i dont..as long as i pass and get promoted..

i dont want to waste my parents money spending for a repeat-ing year..

and i really want to get out from the school asap...i cant stand with the system and such..

talk abt this to my parents just now during dinner..

im grateful to have an understanding parent..

i tot dad didnt approve of retaking my 0s..he even said "did i ever stop you?"

but he wants me to stay in school even if i have to repeat another year..

"there's no escalator,lift or highway for success"he added..

im praying hard hoping for miracle...

i really wanna pass my exam..readers wld u do me a favour?

pray for me can??thanks readers...

thanks to rab for all the support...thanks sis..thanks alot...i never tot of discussing this with my parents..maybe

the biggest reason was that i dont want them to feel remorseful.

and im afraid they dont want to hear this from me and started nagging..

again thanks rab..

hold on! if you realise my blog cam da lain kan....
yeah! when the last time i use it idk y tangan gatal sgt so i gode here and there..then suddenly jd gini...so yeah gna re-do everything aft 0s aft 12 december..haha!
in the meantime enjoy this song aite!

2010-08-14T00:25:00.002+08:00

will be away..

ill be back in few mths back..

takecare all readers..

enjoy life..

exams is around the corner so no more slacking k ppl!! get yr butt off the lappy and start revising..

throw away the IT!!its mind controller..

u lead yr life..

now my books goes party with me!! wakawaka!!